Saturday, May 16, 2009

Rules Governing Relationships

If you have read the book, 15 Universal Laws of Relationships then these laws will not be new to you but if you haven't read it, you can have the main part of the book below:
The 1st Universal Law of Relationships is: There is no free lunch. The old saying goes: love is blind, and that is undeniably true. In those initial stages of infatuation with each other, you see no evil and hear no evil. There is the common belief that love conquers everything, and the rest of your life together will be moonlight and roses. I am very sorry to burst that bubble, because even though love is a very powerful emotion, it is not a panacea for everything that can go wrong in a relationship.
Do not get me wrong. New love is most probably the best experience in your life. It is incredibly emotional, and the feelings you experience is almost impossible to describe in words. It is simultaneously the biggest feeling of joy and pain one can experience. But it is good to be pre-warned that this state of euphoria is not going to last forever. Sooner or later, like a new automobile, the novelty wears off, there are some breakdowns and some maintenance is required.
The truth of the matter is that a relationship is quid pro quo. If you do something for me, I'll reciprocate. If you do nothing, you are not going to get anything in return. Love is not free, even though a lot of lovers may disagree with me. If you give love, you expect to be loved in return. If this does not happen, the relationship will break down very quickly. This rule is the foundation of every relationship, and not taking cognizance of it, is a dire risk.
I recently did a little online survey in which I asked how far a partner would go to make sure that something like being obese will not ruin their marriage. The answers shocked me. Almost without fail they said that if the other partner do not like the way they look, he or she knows what they can do. To say that I found this immensely selfish and egocentric is an understatement.
Take the following scenario, for example: The couple is in their mid thirties and married for ten years. They are both university graduates, but the husband holds a corporate job, whilst the wife is a lawyer with her own practice. Over the years the husband has become disillusioned with his career and turned into a real couch potato, neglecting his appearance and gaining a substantial amount of weight. The wife on the other had, despite two children, is doing well in her practice, goes to gym regularly and has maintained a pretty good figure. She now feels her husband is letting her down, because he is a bit of an embarrassment at social functions and when entertaining important clients. Would it be unreasonable of her to ask him to join her at the gym and do something about his appearance? In my book certainly not.
At this stage he is enjoying all the benefits. He has got a wife with a beautiful body; she is successful, contributes a lot to the household and is an example to the children and the community. Unfortunately the same cannot be said for him, aside from the financial contribution that he makes. If he refuses to reciprocate, can one then blame the wife if she starts looking for a more suitable partner?
That is the 1st Universal Law of Relationships: Do not expect to get the benefit of something without doing something in return. And this law or rule does not only hold true in personal relationships, it is also valid in your work scenario. Your company pays you in return for the input that you give. No input equals no payment and no job.
The truth of the matter is that every relationship is fraught with challenges and potential problems. And unless both partners are prepared for these and willing to work hard together to resolve it, the relationship will not succeed or last.

Long Distance Relationship Advice - Three Keys to Making it Work

I am not a long distance relationship advocate but sometimes thing just happen that way that we can't control what life will throw at us, hence the posting of this article on making long distance relationship work, enjoy the excerpt but learn the lessons and take them to heart;
The way people move around these days more and more of us are looking for long distance relationship advice. Here are 3 key tips from both my personal experience and my research that will help your relationship survive over a distance.
The first thing you and your partner need to do is to be clear on just what the parameters of the relationship are and to what degree are you committed to each other? Obviously there's a big difference in a relationship that's a few weeks old and one that has been exclusive for over a year.
How long do you expect the separation to last? How often will it be practical to see each other? Are you at a stage in your commitment where you both won't date other people, or is that OK with you both?
Some of these questions, especially about dating others, may be a little awkward, but they need to be addressed up-front. Doing so will prevent misunderstandings and heartbreak later.
Besides, any good relationship should be built on understanding and communication. Having that conversation will build those skills.
The next thing needed to form a solid foundation is to develop a positive attitude about the separation. That's not to say you'll look forward to it or prefer that your partner is away, but it does mean you'll make the most of the situation you're in.
When we're involved in a close relationship, most of us let other interests, such as hobbies and other friends, slide a little bit. The time away from your partner is a good opportunity to pay more attention to these other areas.
Some people use it as an opportunity to put more effort into their studies or career.
Another positive way of looking at the situation is that it will give you the opportunity to be creative in maintaining it, which brings me to the third key tip.
Take advantage of modern technology while continuing to use the old.
The traditional method for separated lovers to communicate was the written word. Later the telephone came along. Today, as you well know, there are a lot more options. By all means take advantage of texting and web cams, but remember that nothing will ever replace the romance of a love letter. Writing your sweetie regularly, even you text several times a day and see each other on Skype every night, will help your relationship greatly dring your time apart.
Let's face it, a big fear we all have when we're separated form our lover is that the romance will fade for the relationship or that we'll grow apart or that one person or the other will find someone else. It doesn't have to be that way, but we can't take it for granted that it won't. These three keys are a good start.
By Sandra Williamson.

Commitment: Tips on How to Make a Relationship Work

If everybody already knew how to make a relationship work we would all still be with the first man or woman we fell in love with, but that is not the case. It takes some people years of anguish and heartache to learn how to make a relationship work.  Even then your relationship is unlikely to last unless you are prepared to put what you have learned into practice. If you have just met someone you feel strongly for and you want to know how to make a relationship work then the first thing you need to realize is that it is not easy. In order to have a fulfilling romantic relationship with another individual you must follow three basic rules.
Loyalty And Effort
People who know how to make a relationship work will do whatever is necessary to be with the other person, within reason. The truth is that relationships are like bank accounts. If you keep putting money into the bank then eventually you will be financially comfortable. Conversely if you persistently draw out more than you put in your bank account will soon be empty. Similarly if you take more than you give in a relationship your partner will soon realize there is nothing in it for them. If you both put the work into your relationship then it will blossom and grow. The key is not to get too comfortable and start taking your partner and the love they give you for granted.
Stick To Your Principles
If you sacrifice your values and principles in order to be with the one you love then you do not really know how to make a relationship work, even if you have been married for forty years. Too many people feel taken for granted, abused or neglected by their partner but do not speak up for fear of losing the relationship. Consequently resentment builds up and festers for years until they eventually explode because they cannot take it anymore. Couples who know how to make a relationship work tell each other when there is something they are unhappy or uncomfortable with. This gets things into the open, which is often all that is required to resolve the situation.
Make Time To Be Together
Happily married couples who have been together for years and know how to make a relationship work understand the importance of friendship. Your partner should not just be the person you go to bed with. He or she should also be someone you can laugh, cry and debate with. Your partner should be the person with whom you explore new places and try new experiences. If you know how to make a relationship work you will make time to hang out with the person you love even if you work eighty hours per week.

Commitment:How to Make Your Man Be Committed to a Lasting Relationship

Very few of us are interested in establishing a relationship with a guy just to pass some time. As women, we would like the guys to be committed to the relationships. Yet achieving this usually proves quite a difficult task for many of us.
It is usually frustrating but common for many guys who say they are in love to fail to commit to a marriage relationship. It is a strange fact that many of the guys do not seem to be even interested in establishing a steady date.
As women, is there anything we can do in order to enhance a relationship that seems to get rusty just at the dating stage? The enlightening news is that there are actually a number of things that you can do in order to encourage your guy to make a more lasting commitment. These simple steps will motivate the man to have a drive for pushing things further. Here are some of these effective steps.
What many of us do not realize is the fact that pursuing after a guy only tends to be counterproductive. In case you have been chasing after your man, you need to change tact. You should instead start to be non committal. You will most likely meet resistance if you try to push the man to make a commitment. On the other hand, you will arouse his curiosity if you appear to be non committal.
If you give the impression that you have no thought of taking things any further than they are at present, you will arouse the hunting interest that men have and he will come more strongly after you. There is need of caution; however, as you should not give the impression that you are so content with being single that you will entertain no disturbance of the status quo.
A number of simple things will help you to drive the message home subtly. For instance, make your own plans that do not include him in any way. You may be 'busy' in other places when you know that the guy will need your presence. Instead of being available to him, you may go out with your girlfriends.
In case you have been in the habit of calling the guy, you should stop it, effectively driving the message that you have other matters to take care of. When the guy realizes that you are not fully in his grasp, he will not take the relationship lightly any more.
You also need to watch the things that you say. Ask yourself whether you are giving him a good picture that would make him enjoy your presence in a lasting commitment. For instance, you should not make the guy dread your company by giving the indication that you will nag him.
Such simple measures will help you to encourage your guy to be interested in considering tying the knot with you. You do not have to spend your time in constant worry as to when, or even whether, he will finally decide to settle down with you. Help him to make the decision instead. 
Are you ready NOW for a complete dating life make over?
 By Chris J Robert

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

How to Start Dating More Girls Now

When I read this article I felt like really showing every guy that I know, read the article below and pass it on to other guys:
Guys are often wondering what they can do to start getting more girls to like them and go on more dates. Your social life doesn't have to stay boring and uneventful, you can get out there and start getting phone numbers with just a few important pieces of information. This article will give you the tools you need to stay on top of the dating scene and begin meeting more girls and being able to talk to the ones that you like without problem.
The first thing any guy must have when attracting a girl he likes is confidence. If you don't feel comfortable with your own body and who you are as a person, then you won't be attractive to any girl. Girls can typically sense whether a guy has confidence or not. Usually guys who have confidence in themselves walk with their head up looking straight ahead. They make eye contact when talking to people, especially girls they are interested in.
Besides having confidence, being an energetic and enthusiastic person is also important. By being friendly, smiling, and introducing yourself to a girl properly with a hand shake and offering your name, you are letting her know that you are interested in her while still remaining cool and confident. You never want to appear like you are desperate to any girl, that is one of the most unattractive characteristics that girls tend to avoid in most guys, so play it cool. Don't make it seem like you aren't interested, but don't over do it at the same time.
To learn even more powerful dating tips and strategies and give yourself the ability to get any girl you want always visit this site :

How to Know If a Girl Likes You - 5 Sure Shot Signs to Figure Out Whether a Girl Likes You Or Not

If you are totally infatuated with a girl but are not sure if she too likes you then do not lose your confidence. Read these 5 signs on how to know if a girl likes you and make your move if the signs indicate a yes....
Sign 1 - She does her cat scan over you. You might notice that she looks at you at regular intervals and scans you from top to bottom to top again. So, dress well and do not slouch.
Sign 2 - She smiles at you. If she likes what she scans then chances are that she will give you a shy smile or even a bold one if she too is besotted by you. If she is shy, she might look away when you look at her but if she is bold then she might just mouth out a "meow".
Sign 3 - She finds an excuse to talk to you. She might catch hold of a friend and ask to be introduced to you. Once introduced, she will certainly try to keep the conversation going while trying to gather more information about you.
Sign 4 - She gives her phone number. She might use an excuse to give her phone number to you or if she is bold enough, might directly give it to you without any hesitation. In other words, she expects you to call her up.
Sign 5 - She has singled you out. If there are other fish around you and the girl has only given attention and her number to you then she certainly likes only you. You may now break into a mental jig and plan out your first date.
These 5 signs will indicate that the girl that you like is also into you and she will indicate visually, verbally and with her body language that she is ready to be courted by you.

Do Nice Guys Always Finish Last When it Comes to Getting Girls? Here is Something You Must Not Miss

I don't like the title of this article but it is true, Read the article below:
Well it is seen often that nice guys finish last when it comes to women and dating. Indeed nice guys do finish last in most cases. There are several reasons why this happens. Being too nice at times can ruin your chances of being good with women.
Why do nice guys finish last?
They try and make the girl too comfortable so that she is attracted to you. You like to create some amount of tension in the atmosphere that can help her come close to you. What nice guys do is that they make the girl so comfortable that she ends up talking casually as if she was talking to a friend.
Nice guys do not expect to be respected- There are nice guys out there who are willing to do anything for the girl even though it is at the cost of their own self respect. They are ready to take anything that can please the girl no matter what the way his with the hope that they will get the girl they target. The point is that guys may end up losing the girl if they let her crush your self respect.
It is a natural tendency for men to chase things that are not too easy to handle. The same concept applies to women while they are dating. Girls work hard to catch the attention of a guy who is not easy than the one's who are an easy catch. So to all the nice guys out there please rethink!! If you want the girl make yourself a difficult catch. Being nice is no more a virtue and you need to change according to the situation if you want to catch the girl of your dream.
Rahul Talwar
But with those who have made an impression upon your heart, I have noticed that you are timid. This quality might affect a bourgeois, but you must attack the heart of a woman of the world with those weapons... I tell you on behalf of women: there is not one of us who does not prefer a little rough handling to too much consideration. Men lose through blundering more hearts than virtues saves. The more timidity a lover shows with us the more it concerns our pride to goad him on; the more respect he has for our resistance, the more we demand of him. We would willingly say to you men: "Ah, in pity' name do not suppose us to be so very virtous; you are forcing us to have too much of it..."
We  are continually struggling to hide the fact the fact that we have permitted ourselves to be loved. Put a woman in a position to say that she has yielded only to a species of violence, or to surprise: persuade her that you do not undervalue her, and I will answer for her heart... A little more boldness on your part would put you both at your ease. Always remember that "a reasonable man in love may act like a madman, but he should not and cannot act like an idiot"


Saturday, May 9, 2009

The Role of Love Quotes in Our Everyday Lives

A famous love quote can make anything more romantic, like a radio greetings, cell phone text messages and personal letters. Famous quotes help convey a message that one find it difficult to express in his own words. It fosters a better relationship, or helps rekindle old feelings. It has more positivism to it than one can possibly imagine.
All people in any age group use quotes at some point in their lives. Whether they are youngsters experiencing crushes, a divorced looking for a new relationship or an old person falling in love again, almost every person love to use quotes in order to tell their deepest and truest feelings.
Cute quotes are classified as those sayings that could not be taken as very serious and deep, yet it conveys the real emotions of love in a more playful tone. It still ignites the same passion. These are often sent to those just starting out a relationship, or to begin conveying feelings of fondness for another person. It will be awkward to say to someone you barely know the words, "I love you," yet a cute quote will send the message that you are beginning to like that person.
Cute love quotes can also be everyday messages that a couple will send to one another to spice up a day, especially if the stress from work is creeping in. For example, if one says he finds a girl as bright as a sunshine, he does not mean this literally. He is complimenting the girl and giving subtle hints of adoration.
Some quotes are actually famous lines or dialogues from a movie. In the movie The Fever Pitch by Drew Barymore, there is a very good line there that says, "You are romantic, you have a lyric soul and you could love under the worst and best conditions." In the songs performed by Nicole Kidman and Evan McGregor, there is a particular line that turned into a utilized movie love quote. The line is, "Storm clouds can gather and stars can collide, but I love you until the end of time."
A sad love quote is made or given by a person who had failed in love. It is a bitter reality that some relationships finish on a sour note. Numerous sad quotes refer to relationship breakups while some other sad quotes pertain to the act of moving on. Some sad quotes talk about infidelity and disloyalty. The quote, "Even if my heart might call your name in the rain, even if these arms might desire to embrace you once again. Even if I cry out and is no longer in pain, I will never fall in-love this way again," is an example of a sad quote. Yet, the important thing is to learn and live by the message. And a sad quote ultimately hopes to inspire love anew.
Many people consider love as the most wonderful gift of God to mankind. And for this reason alone, It will be perpetualized. People go on a life journey, and they will go through different stages of life. These quotes, though mushy at times, will help them live by.
There will be times when we will be left alone to deal with our own emotions, be it happy or sad. And love quotes are just within reach to nurture these feelings. It makes us grow stronger and steadfast to our beliefs.
Our stronghold to love quotes is manifest in many ways. These words are scattered in our scrapbooking crafts, in the photographs we cherish and put in frames, in our bookmarks, posters and other memorabilia.
By David Urmann

3 Ways to Know If You Are Their One True Love - Is it Really True Love?

Things have been going great with a new partner. The last few months have been a whirlwind of fun for you both. You're starting to think this could be it - you may have finally found true love. But what are they thinking? Are you their one true love? Read on to find out how to tell.
1) When you truly love someone, their happiness comes before your own. If your partner is always willing to take the back seat if it means you will be happier, that's a good sign. They might even care enough to feel similar emotions to yourself, getting very upset whenever you are. By showing the fact that your happiness is most important in public and to their friends, you may have someone that has found their true love.
2) Plans for the future. Has your partner already started talking about kids, marriage or where you might live together? If they're looking that far ahead, there's a pretty good chance that you are in their picture of an ideal life. Perhaps your partner will make it obvious to you that they want you around for a long time, perhaps not. As with most aspects of relationships, simply listening for the clues and talking about things honestly makes finding your one true love even easier.
3) When you're in a busy place, like a train station or football match, your partner might start to seem more clingy. This is a good thing! You're safe, reassuring and not as scary as all these other people around them. Hopefully they won't let any distractions get in the way of their true love.
Remember that there is never a rush. True love is such a wonderful thing and it is always worth waiting for. The right person is out there for each of us, and whether you have found them yet or not, it takes patience, listening and mutual effort. Your true love is waiting for you - maybe you have already met them!

Finding Your True Love - Cupid's Arrow Has Found Its Target

How do you know when you've found true love? Does it even exist? If so, how do you go about finding it? These are questions that have plagued men and women down through the centuries. Some are lucky enough to have it. If you are one who hasn't-or isn't sure, there are a few pointers that can help you start on the road to finding true love!
Love-and life-would be so much easier if there were a manual out there explaining exactly where to find it. Unfortunately, we don't have such a book. And to make matters worse, romantics tell us it pops up when we least expect it!
So where do we look for true love?
In today's world, we have a myriad of options: online dating, speed dating, blind dates, bars, parties, friends, church groups, supermarkets, libraries, and on and on. Yet, with all of these options (and many, many more), so many of us are still looking for that true love.
Love yourself
As corny as it may sound, the first step to finding true love is to love yourself. Take pride in your accomplishments! Take pride in your appearance. Develop interests and hobbies. These are the types of things that make you a well-rounded, confident person. And guys find confidence sexy! Not to mention a well-rounded person is fun and interesting to be around.
Know what you want
We all have our standards. Don't allow yourself to settle for less. If you follow the previous rule, and are a confident, well-rounded woman, you won't want to settle for less than you want-and deserve. This would only subtract from your own accomplishments and interests.
True love does not subtract from, but adds to, an already-satisfactory life.
Keep those standards high
Make sure that you not only know what you want, but make sure you set those standards high enough. Someone might seem like a great guy, but if he can't provide you with the loving relationship you deserve, why would you settle for this? If it's important to you that a guy be physically fit, don't compromise your standards for the chubby guy you feel bad for.
Be patient
This has a lot to do with the previous points. A woman who leads a self-fulfilled life with her own interests does not settle. She doesn't compromise. She doesn't give up in her search for what she truly wants. When things don't work out in one relationship, she doesn't give up on true love.
And, finally, true love requires that both partners give of themselves. Only by loving oneself, and being in a relationship that you truly want to be in, can a woman give of herself enough to find true love.
These are all small tips that work together. By following them, you can find your true love!
By Tina Jones

Who Wants to Be in Love?

Everyone wants to be in love!
I live in a little coastal village in California and work in my own gallery/studio on a quiet street, off the beaten path, yet still in the village. Everyday people wander in an out and reveal their lives as they look through the happy things they see. It is amazing to me to observe how many men and women seek love and the benefits they hope it will bring to their lives. It is amazing to me to see how many people are lacking that love in their lives.
When I ask people what they really want in a loved one, some of them can describe the person, some cannot. Some believe their right person exists, some do not. Some are looking to fill a void in their life, some are looking to make an addition.
But, when it comes down to it. everyone wants to be in love. Love seems to be the answer to all kinds of questions, the solution to all kinds of problems. Fine! Fine! But how to get that right person, the one to be in love with, is the secret.
After a bit of study, lots of observation and a good deal of experience it seems to me that a person has to know for sure what they want, rather than who they want. They need to know the qualities they want in another. To me high on that list is goodness. It is a great quality to insist upon in a loved one. I don't know how many people think of this, but it is extremely important. It covers a whole group of things like kindness, truthfulness, politeness, graciousness, unselfishness, generosity, and wholesomeness. To be good is more than following the rules. It is a sincere and essential quality of the heart. It lasts.
By Sally Huss

3 Unusually Touching Ways to Express Your Love

People have been saying "I love you" to their loved ones countless times that the whole concept has become a little boring. However, with these unique ways to say I love you to your special someone, you'll be able to keep the relationship fresh and exciting.
1) Say it in a different language.
One of the unique ways to say I love you is by using another language. Try something that's not so common.
You might want to say "Te amo" and then smile mysteriously when she asks you what it means. In Chinese, you can say "Wo ai ni." In German, you might want to try "Ich Liebe Diche." Of course, you should do your research and find out exactly how these words are to be pronounced.
2) Say it out of the blue.
There are moments when saying I love you is expected. Are you two enjoying a romantic boat ride together? Naturally, you're supposed to say I love you some time during the experience.
However, it would also be wonderful to say it out of the blue. For example, is your partner washing the dishes? Or is he or she driving the car? Saying I love you out of the blue makes a person's reaction more genuine and heartfelt.
3) Shout it out loud.
One of the most expressive and unique ways to say I love you is by shouting it out loud, and telling it to the world. If you're the adventurous and bold type, this should be easy for you.
You can call attention to everyone around you and shout your loved one's name, followed by a very passionate "I love you" to him or her. Or you can stay on top of a building and proclaim your affections for the whole city to hear.
There are many unique ways to say I love you. Don't stick with the stereotype and look for ways to make your relationship exciting.

Are You Ready For LOVE?

At first, you might think that question is a no-brainer. I mean, who in their right mind would turn away from being loved. But if you look at the statistics of divorce or weigh the facts that cheating, neglect, and abuse is on the rise in a lot of relationships, it becomes clear that for some, love isn't enough.
When it comes to being loved and accepting the love that is coming in your direction, there are some major barriers blocking such an experience. Some people ... maybe you're one of them, haven't learned to love themselves. They seek out that which is missing from within, hoping that someone else can fill the void.
So many relationships go bad for that reason alone. You are looking in the wrong direction for help or healing. You think that the other person has what you need but you don't realize that the gift of love first, springs from within and then manifests without.
Another barrier that stops love at the door is when your expectations of some material or physical specifics aren't met. Individuals part ways more often than not due to religious, cultural, class, or racial differences? Unfortunately, the love that passes through all space and time from one soul mate to another must continue to wait until both people are ready to experience the true power that love has over ideas.
If you are ready to really love and be loved there is nothing stopping you from experiencing such an event. I truly believe that you attract like energy to you and what you feel and think you put out into the universe and likewise will draw that same kind of energy back to you. Your challenge is determining how soon you want it and more specially, if you are in a position to respond in kind.
By Felicia Townsend

Love Percentages - How Do You Test Your True Feelings?

A love percentage compatibility test is just one of the ways that you can measure your feelings for another person. There are many love percentage tests available on the Internet. Some of these tests require no more information than you and the other party's first and last name. Other love percentage tests ask questions about how you feel when you see the person, how long you have had feelings and other questions that delve into the relationship.
Love percentage tests are fun way to think about a new relationship. They provide some insight into feelings that you may have for another person and give you a way to waste time and think about your crush at the same time. Love-percentages should not be taken too seriously, but the more involved tests do ask some important questions.
Psychologists and marriage counselors have been able to pinpoint many of the factors that increase the likelihood of long term satisfaction in your relationship. Some of the love-percentage compatibility tests ask questions about the very things that matter in the long run.
A shared view of the future is very important for long term marriage satisfaction. Without this, it will be difficult to remain a happy couple. What factors attract you to each other is another point that you should explore through a love-percentage-test. While there are no right answers for either of these questions, a common answer is the key. If you both have similar long term goals for your relationship and you both respect similar things about each other, your love/relationship percentage increases.
What do you find attractive about your significant other? This is another question frequently asked on love-percentage-quizzes. While attractive looks are a nice quality, there had better be something deeper there if you hope to remain in a relationship. A shared sense of humor; respect for another's intellect, or passion about a shared goal are all attributes that will increase your love percentage.
Love/relationship percentage tests can be a lot of fun. If you are in a current relationship, they are a great way to jump-start a conversation or kill some time. If you are newly dating someone, it can be fun to use a love calculator to see what the chances of a successful relationship are for you and your significant other. Whatever you do, don't take the results too seriously, instead see them for the fun diversion that they are.
By Emeka Ezidiegwu

Relationship Advice on Keeping True Love

True love. What a great feeling! Books, movies and songs are made about it. We all tend to think there is one true love for us and we can't be eternally happy until we find it.
So we search all over and finally find someone and it does feel fantastic - for about the first six months or so. During this time, we feel totally loved and we love everything about our new mate.
After about six months or so we find that the feeling of true love begins to fade some. We start to have little arguments and conflicts. We notice we want a little space or we get hurt that our mate wants some space. What happened to true love. Is it lost?
No, it isn't. This is going to happen for all of us. Researchers have found that relationships have phases. They call the first phase of a new relationship the oceanic love phase. This is where everything is great and we feel so loved and loving towards our mate. It is a powerful bonding phase. It feels great.
But then, the research finds, we all move out of that phase into the me/us phase. In this phase, we differentiate, we separate some, we get back to working on our own goals and interests, we don't want to spend ALL our time with our mate. We start having some conflicts with our partner in this phase. This is normal and healthy and natural.
If we didn't move apart some, we wouldn't be able to function well in the world. We'd be a merged mess with our partner, trying to get all our happiness from each other, which doesn't work long term. We each have to move on with our lives separately and as a couple, we have to take our journeys.
So here's the thing. If you want to keep true love, you have to adjust. Don't give up when the oceanic love phase passes. You have to learn that it is deeper than just the first strong physical attraction. You have to figure out that it is about loving the whole person, with their strengths and weaknesses.
And understand that conflict will occur even with true love. Two healthy adults will pull in separate directions from time to time. True love includes conflict and working things out when they get a little uncomfortable, not running away. You don't get to keep true love until you learn it is bigger than just the fun times.
By John Laney. 

Friday, May 8, 2009

For Perfect Love? Start Here!!!

You may sincerely not like this but it is the genesis of this blog , the post you will read below is a true life story but also intended to sell a very wonderful product that has worked for me and so many others, enjoy the excerpts...
Winning your ex back: My concerted effort approach
Change is a lifelong process, hence going through a break up and trying to make up is not going to be easy. I am not going to deceive you but if you have evaluated your situation and you have convinced yourself, that it is worth trying again, remember that “the better you are as a person, the more irresistible you become”, that is what the break up, should have done to your life.
The concerted approach method is underneath explained.
Tip 1: Be willing to change and grow: Anybody who is unwilling to make changes stagnates, ideally everyone should desire to change, grow better and continuous growth is needed to spice up a loving relation. Observe the necessary changes you need to make and be willing to make them.
Tip 2: Know your strengths and weakness: It is helpful to understand that presently, the one you have lost may feel that you are not the person of their dreams, that’s all right. You are not perfect but it does not mean you have lost that person forever, you can still work your way back into his or her heart. Recognize your strengths and weaknesses. When you face a weakness, acknowledge it, and then accept it, this process must of the time will transform that weakness into strength, denial of it, is what brings the problem and it will no longer just be an illusion.
This process of acknowledging your weakness, gives you time to face the truth and show you have taken a big step forward to becoming a better person, which definitely is seen by all. This new found humility will actually create a charismatic magnetic attraction to you. Your sincere recognition of your weakness will radiate from you naturally, and help you win back the one you’ve lost.

Tip 3: Take the bold step! Good communication is an essential key to reestablishing a positive relationship. You may have to settle for any type of interaction to get the lines of communication back. Don’t worry if you feel awkward at first, this is just part of your newfound humility.
Start a conversation, say whatever you have to in order to draw out that person’s feelings, it may be slow in the beginning, depending on your skill, but any effort to apply correct principles will have positive results. Try, try, and try!
Then listen, listen, listen! Try to understand. Be persistent. Show consideration, but suddenly fall into the old traps momentarily. Just be resolute to listen without being defensive, and start again.

Winning back the one you lost, is not hard, if you could just follow set approaches that have worked overtime, so if you need more on how to really make up with the one you lost, approach it concertedly here.